Thu, 29 December 2016
For the last Tread Perilously of 2016, we reopen the case files of the Special Review Unit for an episode of Law & Order: Criminal Intent called "Faith." A seemingly apt title.
Det. Robert Goren and Det. Alex Eames investigate the murder of a man helping Erica Windermere, a young author hiding from her dope gang parents. She's written a book, Through The Darkness, about her struggles with Lou Gehrig's Disease and her early abuse by her drug gang parents. Erica's editor can only offer her email address as contact information. And when Erica responds to Eames' email, Goren asks a most important question: "How has your disease affected your menstruation?" From her answer, he comes to believe that she does not exist.
Executive ADA Louis Allred joins the Special Review Unit once again as Justin meets Det. Goren for the first time. He also learns about the new La Croix Sparkling Water rule for white people. The SRU ends up talking about Taylor Swift. Several respirators are purchased. Doctor What appears to refill a drink and the discussion wanders into another look at Gone Girl. Also, Justin declares that Vincent D'Onofrio is a bad actor, Michael Nouri gets a name check, and Erik's D'Onofrio impression lapses into William Shatner.
Thu, 22 December 2016
Television's darkest, most misguided program becomes Tread Perilously's Christmas special as we watch The Star Wars Holiday Special.
While Han and Chewie try to get to Kashyyyk for Life Day, Chewie's wife Mala tries to make Bantha Rump, his grandfather Itchy beats off to Diahann Carroll and his son Lumpy watches a Star Wars cartoon pilot. Meanwhile, Darth Vader orders every household in the system to be searched for Rebel spies, and Art Carney raids another holiday special with his own brand of merriment. Bea Arthur sings "Goodnight, But Not Goodbye" and Harvey Korman kills comedy forever.
Erik praises Harrison Ford's dedication to his character -- even in this -- and Bea Arthur's performance. Justin uncovers horrors of the 1970s and ponders Itchy's obsession with human women. Period commercials are discussed as both discover unions could once afford airtime. The pair also meet Tobor the Robot and discover Whirpool knew about the world to come 38 years ago. Justin wants a stuffed Bantha for Christmas and leans the secret to braising is "Stir, whip, stir whip; whip, whip, stir."
Thu, 15 December 2016
Tread Perilously dives into the center of the Christmas spirit with a grouchy Santa and oil explorations in The Night They Saved Christmas (Now available on Amazon Video!).
An oil-digger's family is abducted by Santa's chief elf in an attempt to save North Pole City from the machinations of businessman Sumner Murdoch and his fear of the unseen Gaylord. While "they" learn the secrets of Santa's power and tour Dr. Fernando's lab of scientific wonders, the oil-digger gets chewed out by his boss and let's down his emotionally distraught son. Will "they" save Christmas or will Murdoch ruin Christmas forever? Also, Paul Williams has a prominent role.
Erik reveals how the movie forms the first chapter of his gritty origin story while Justin blames Dr. Fernando for all of his troubles. The pair also discuss Phantasm, Dune, Dungeons & Dragons and the tall dwarf phenomenon in Hawk the Slayer. Erik diagrams his obsession with the phrase "Christmas Eve Day." Justin imagines a time when the alt-right went looking for the Hollow Earth. Impressively bad dialogue is discussed as is Jaclyn Smith's TV movie career. Also, Justin attempts to determine who the unseen "Gaylord" really is and why he drugged the Saudis.
Because nothing says Christmas like the high stakes world of petroleum production.
Thu, 8 December 2016
Tread Perilously begins the Christmas season with a return visit to the TARDIS for "Voyage of the Damned."
Thu, 1 December 2016
Quality Time with Family Ties' Paul Pakler joins Tread Perilously for a visit with Family Ties as they head for the United Kingdom in the TV movie Family Ties Vacation.
Steven, Elyse, Mallory and Jennifer join Alex as he spends fourteen days (or is it months?) studying at Oxford during the summer session. But Latverian agents select Elyse to smuggle microfilm out of the US. Alex's dorm mate, Lord Bullington-Covingwick Zabka, falls in love with Mallory while Steven and Elyse join a bumbling New Scotland Yard detective to foil the Latverians. Alex joins a crew team and the Keatons cause an incident at the House of Lords.
Meanwhile, Jennifer feeds some cows.
Paul reveals the secret reason why the movie exists at all while Erik explains Cold War espionage and Justin assumes England is filled with eldritch horrors. Justin gets confused about the difference between a batman and The Batman. He also decries the Family Ties' tendency to air clipshows. The group considers the fact that the vacation is apparently never referenced in the show proper and imagine a world in which Harrison Ford starred in Three Men and a Baby.