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Tread Perilously


Aug 31, 2023

With an extra week in August, Tread Perilously re-opens the Grab Bag for an extra verse in The Ballad of John D. Cort -- the Baywatch episode called "Shark Derby."

The annual shark season is a little bit more robust than usual with sightings more common and local restaurateur Bucky sponsoring a shark derby. Contestants, which include John D. Cort, Eddie, Captain Thorpe, and Hobie, must bring in the largest shark possible. But Mitch, always wary of Bucky, doubts the increasing shark population is a coincidence. Did the entrepreneur figure out a way to invite more sharks to the coastal waters? And will it prove fatal for a member of Mitch's team?

Justin busts out the shark facts right quick. Erik recalls the soon-to-be-closed fish restaurant Gladstones. Both marvel at the simplicity of Bucky's scheme. The 1980s hangover gets dissected. Captain Thorpe's descent into madness makes its way to Hobie. Peter Benchley's Jaws comes up often. David Hasselhoff's actual height becomes unavoidable. For the first time ever, original Baywatch character Jill matters. Hasselhoff's need to barge into scenes gets called out. Erika Eleniak's scream is reviewed. Craig's murder eyes make a special appearance and the Hoff gets compared to Tommy Wiseau in a very specific way. Also, the praise for John Allen Nelson continues.